A Man With Nothing to Remember
by Not-understanding-monkeys
Summary: "It's worth it. Every damn thing I can remember. I need to know. Who am I? I'm not who they want me to be. Not anymore. I need to know. The good. The bad. All of it. No more hiding… Here we go." The Story of The Winter Soldier BEFORE Steve found him again. *SOME romance with Bucky/Natasha, cuz even if you don't ship it, it DID happen in the beginning of the story.
1. Chapter 1

**|| Hey guys! Thanks so much for looking at my story! This is one of my first real fanfictions. I've written two before this but it has been a while. This story is rate M for language, violence, other adult themes, and possible rape in later chapters. Please please review! Feel free to pitch me an idea that you would like to see in a later chapter. Now, that doesn't guarantee that I will use your idea, but it will definitely help me brainstorm! ATTENTION: THIS STORY IS NOT COMIC BOOK ACCURATE. I have taken some minor aspects from the comic books, but the majority of this story is of my own imagination. DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN THESE CHARACTERS.**

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**A Man With Nothing to Remember**

**Chapter One**

_Avengers Tower,_

_December 17, 3:33am_

"You're a good man," she said as she ran a hand over his sweaty cheek.

"Not really, no," Bucky said and he grabbed her wrist gently and lowered it slowly back to her side. "But you're the only one who understands that." He was used to his nightmares waking people up. It had become quite normal now. But he was sick of it. Sick of keeping it bottled up, for the more he crammed it down,

the worse the nightmares got. The worse he felt about himself. He needed to be rid of it all. He needed to be free of this.

He looked over at Steve who just watched them with concern. "I didn't know what I was doing." He looked down so he wouldn't have to look at them. "They cut me open and stitched me back together more times than I can count."

She ran a hand through Bucky's hair to stop him. "You don't have to talk about it."

Bucky nodded. "Yes, I do." He looked over at Steve who still hadn't said a word. "It's the only way I'm going to get past this." Bucky walked over to the large wall-scale window and stared out at the busy streets of New York City. "I don't remember the fall. In fact, the first day is still a blur to me." He rested his right shoulder against the glass and sighed, leaving behind a puff of condensation on the window. "I remember someone dragging me through the snow. They were talking to me, but I couldn't quite make out what they were saying. At first I thought I was dead. But I realized I wasn't when I noticed I was missing half my arm. I didn't have much time to freak out though, I kept blacking out."

Steve walked over and stood next to Bucky. He rested a hand on his shoulder to comfort him.

"The next thing I remember, I'm strapped to an operating table. I was surrounded by men in white lab coats. And t-they..." He stuttered slightly and took a deep breath to try to stop his hand from shaking. "They were cutting it off," he whispered as a tear rolled down his cheek. "All the way up to the shoulder. I blacked out again. And then next time I woke," he shrugged his left shoulder, "I had this, THING for an arm." He blinked a few times as another tear threatened to fall. "I could feel the electricity flowing through it. I could feel the power it had. I lost control." He looked over at Steve who also had tears in his eyes. She stayed back though. Bucky suspected maybe it was too hard for her to be near him. Maybe she was afraid to cry. Or maybe she was afraid to learn how the story really happened. All she knew was what THEY had told her.

"I grabbed the doctor by the throat and I..." He felt a shutter ripple through his spine. "I threw him across the room like he was a rag-doll." Bucky stared off into the city and his eyes glazed over as the full flashback took hold of him.

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_An Old Operating Room,_

_Unknown Date, Unknown Time_

The doctors ran quickly to help their fallen comrade as he coughed for air. They stared at him with wide eyes filled with fear. The Soldier broke free of his binds with ease and stumble to his feet. He looked down at his hands then back up to the doctors. "_WHAT_ _THE HELL ARE YOU DOING TO ME?_" He shouted as he started pacing back and forth with anxiety and confusion. "_WHERE AM I?_" He turned to one of the doctors and slammed him hard against the wall with the metal arm clenched firmly around his throat. He lifted him off the ground and the man's gagging went silent as his eyes began to bug out of his head. His mouth was open, but no sound came out. "Someone better start talking or–"

The sound of a gun cocking made the Soldier stop dead in his tracks. A man in a Russian military uniform had entered the room and had a large handgun pressed against the back of his head. "Sit down, soldier," he said through a thick Russian accent.

The Soldier dropped the doctor, who began coughing violently, and slowly turned around and sat back on the operating table without taking his eyes off the man.

The man walked toward the Soldier, but didn't lower his weapon. "Now, you need to calm down. I will answer any questions you have, but you need to ask them in a civilized manner or this is going to get very ugly, very quickly." When he saw the Soldier's shoulders relax, he slowly lowered the gun, but kept it firmly in hand.

The Soldier stared at him for a good five minutes as he tried to figure out what to ask first. "Who are you?" He managed to say.

"My name is General Vasily Karpov."

"Where am I?"

"You're in a hospital facility just a few miles outside of Moscow," Karpov said gently.

The Soldier looked around the room. The air was damp, and there were a few mold spots on the walls. The equipment didn't look clean and there was a glass of dirty water on the table next to him. _Some hospital,_ he thought. He looked down at his robotic arm, startled by it again.

"That was a pretty nasty fall," General Karpov said. "It's not your real arm, but it's pretty close."

"Fall?" The Soldier asked as his brow furrowed in confusion. "I-I don't remember a fall."

General Karpov and the rest of the doctors in the room exchanged looks. He paused for a few moments before putting away his gun and bending down to the Soldier's eye level. "What's your name, soldier?"

The Soldier blinked a few times and he narrowed his eyes, screaming at his brain for information that was lost. "I-I... Don't know.." He looked up at Karpov who was still staring at him. "I mean I don't remember." He racked his brain for any useful pieces of information, but the more he tried to find some, the more he discovered he couldn't remember. What day was it? More importantly, what year? How old was he? Where was he from? He knew his accent was American, but beyond that he had no idea. "I don't remember anything," he said finally.

General Karpov rose to his feet. He motioned for the doctors to leave the room and he followed them as they began filing out the door. "Don't go anywhere," he said as he disappeared through the doorway.

The Soldier looked around the room again. He wasn't quite sure WHERE he was, but the room itself gave him the creeps. It reeked of stale blood and death. He stood up slowly and wandered the room. He ran his normal hand along the side of a wooden table. Old blood patches stained the wood and sections of the walls, and the different tools and knives were also stained. He drew his metal hand into a fist and out again. He could hear the sounds of the technology working in the arm and looking at it for too long make him uncomfortable. He turned away from the table and noticed something just poking out from underneath a furnace in the corner. What was that? Was that a... Finger?

The door opened, causing the Soldier to look up, and the General walked back in followed by the doctors. One of them had a bandage wrapped around his hand. Blood soaked through the bandage on a stub where his pointer finger should've been. The Soldier glanced back at the finger on the ground and swallowed.

Karpov walked over to the soldier and put a hand on his shoulder, steering him back to the table where he gently pushed him into a sitting position. "Unfortunately, there is not a whole lot we can help you with. You don't know who you are, and until you gain your memories back, neither will we."

The Soldier looked up. "You mean I can get them back?"

Karpov nodded. "Perhaps. We will do everything we can to help you remember. But until then, your going to have to stay with us."

The soldier blinked at him.

"It wouldn't make sense for you to go back into a world you know nothing about." Karpov put his hands on his hips. "But your stay here isn't going to be free. You're going to have to help us with a few things. And besides," he nodded to the Soldiers' robotic arm. "You'll have to pay that off too. That's an expensive piece of equipment you've got there. It was all we had."

The Soldier nodded. "Yes, sir. I will do whatever you ask. I owe you that for saving my life alone." He looked up at them through soft blue eyes. "Thank you." These people were kind to him. They could have just left him to die in the snow, but they didn't. They agreed to give him a place to live and to help him regain his memories. Why shouldn't he trust them? That's more than he could ever ask for in a situation like this.

"Allow my people to escort you to the room you will be staying in. And if you need anything, anything at all, please, don't hesitate to ask," Karpov said and smiled at him.

The Soldier returned the smile and followed his men as they lead him away.

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General Karpov watched as they lead the Soldier down the corridor before walking down to the Red Room where his apprentice was training a few female agents in the fighting ring. "Aleksander," he said as he approached.

Aleksander paused his fighting and murmured something in Russian to the two girls who quickly departed. "Sir," he panted in Russian, "how's he doing?" He crossed over to Karpov.

"He's confused. He doesn't know who he is, or where he is. He doesn't remember a thing." Karpov crossed his arms. "I think he's the perfect candidate."

Aleksander's eyes widened. "Are you talking about the Winter Soldier project? What makes you think he'd be fit?"

General Karpov unfolded his arms and crossed over the fighting ring, grabbed a towel and tossed it to him. "Because. The serum worked. There's no way he would have survived that fall if it hadn't. Plus, he doesn't remember a thing. For all he knew, he could have just as easily worked for us already, or another organization like us. His lack of memory makes his mind easy to mold."

Aleksander wiped the back of his neck with the towel. "What do you propose?"

"Department X is in need of a good soldier. He'll need to be trained. That's where you come in."

"But sir–"

"You're ready." Karpov cut in. "You have been for quite some time now. But," he held up a finger threateningly, "don't even think about going easy on him. A man with no memory needs to be pushed hard or he'll start asking questions. Questions that we cannot afford to answer. We keep his name from him, we keep everything from him. You understand?" His eyes narrowed. "And if I even _SUSPECT_ that you're feeding him information I will not hesitate to find another apprentice. One who follows orders."

Aleksander swallowed. "Yes, sir. What do we do first?"

Karpov turned away from Aleksander and made his way toward the door. "Leave that to me."


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

_**Two Weeks Later**_

The Soldier sat in a rusted folding chair and stared at the gun in his hand. He glanced up for the tenth time at the man that was tied to a chair on the other side of the room. He had a bag over his head, but the Soldier could tell he was tense.

"Who did you say he was again?" He asked quietly.

"I didn't," General Karpov said as he stood next to him with a hand on the back of the chair.

The Soldier glanced at him again. "What did he do?"

Karpov glanced at Aleksander who stood in the corner. He shrugged at him. "He was caught trying to steal from the weapons room."

The Soldier stared at the gun in his hand and turned it over blankly.

Karpov sighed and leaned down and murmured quietly in his ear. "You can't keep doing this. You're either with us or we're going to have to consider you the enemy."

The Soldier shook his head. "No, I'm with you. I just–" he stopped himself.

"Just what?"

The Soldier stood up abruptly and shot the man in the forehead and his head fell back and hit the wall with a THUD. "Nothing," he said as he handed the gun to Aleksander.

One of the armed guards pulled the sack off of the man's head to check his pulse. He looked up and shook his head.

The Soldier stared at the dead man. "Is he–"

"American?" Karpov cut in. "Yes."

The Soldier nodded and turned and exited the room without another word.

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Karpov walked down the corridor with his apprentice at his side. They murmured back and forth in Russian. "He's weak," Karpov said as he clasped his hands behind his back.

Aleksander nodded. "I know. I've done my best in training him, but he's distracted. His mind wanders and he keeps asking questions."

Karpov looked over at him sharply. But Aleksander held his hands up in defense.

"I didn't tell him anything. But that doesn't seem to stop him." He looked at his master. "We need to do something. As long as he's distracted, this Winter Soldier project will be just a waste of time with him."

"Then wipe him," Karpov said flatly.

Aleksander's eyes widen. "You mean–"

"As long as he has the freedom to ask he's not going to leave us alone. Take him to the chair." Karpov narrowed his eyes. "This time, if he doesn't do what he's told the first time we tell him, he needs to believe that we are going to kill him. No more questions. He doesn't get that freedom. Wipe him, and start over." Karpov turned and walked back the way he came, leaving his apprentice alone in the corridor.

_**9 Years Later**_

"No, you're not listening to me," the Soldier hissed in Russian with irritation as he looked at the black-haired female he had in a choke hold. Aleksander had been having him train this girl to fight and he was getting very frustrated with her lack of effort. He released the girl who rose back to her feet. She was panting and watching him with intense brown eyes. "I told you before, when I advance on you from above, you need to move down to the LEFT, not the right. My arm is coming down on you here," he pressed down on her right side. "In order to make a clean getaway, your move should be down and LEFT."

She watched him and inched closer. She grabbed his hand and placed it on her hip. "You attack here?" She leaned to the left slightly and placed a firm hand on his crotch. "Sorry, left you said?"

The Soldier grabbed her wrist roughly, flipped her to the ground and straddled her. His left arm close around her throat and he glared at her with an unforgiving stare. "Don't ever try anything like that again or I swear to god I'll kill you and save your enemies the trouble."

She gagged and nodded, her face turning redder the longer he held her. He let go of her roughly and walked out of the ring, ignoring her coughing fit.

He approached Aleksander with frustration on his face. "Lukin, I'm done with her. She is useless. She does not listen and she is not focused. I've worked with her for two weeks now and I see absolutely no improvement."

Lukin crossed his arms as he watched her gasp for air in the middle of the ring. "You think she's useless?"

The Soldier nodded. "Yes, sir."

His mentor shrugged at him. "Why is she still here? Get rid of her then."

The Soldier turned and grabbed his handgun off the bench along the wall and shot her in the forehead without blinking. He thrust the handgun into Lukin's chest. "I'm not cleaning that up," he said as he grabbed a towel and exited the Red Room.

General Karpov entered the Red Room just in time to see the soldier exit. He looked over at the lifeless body in the middle of the ring, blood dripping from her head.

"He's ready," Lukin said as he stared at the body.

Karpov ran a hand through his hair. "You'd better be right. Because the one I'm sending him next needs to work. She has too much potential to be thrown away. This one on the other hand, was just a test for him. And I think he passed."

Lukin looked over at the general, surprised to hear him agree.

He shrugged. "He notices weakness, and he knows when someone can't be controlled. That's exactly what we need from him." He snapped his fingers in the direction in which the soldier had left. "Bring him in. He needs to be acquainted with his new student."

Lukin dipped his head at his master and left to retrieve the soldier.

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The Soldier stood in his room with a bottle of water. He poured some over his face to rinse it of sweat and wiped it with a towel. He heard footsteps echoing down the corridor and set the bottle on the floor. The door opened and Lukin poked his head in.

"General Karpov needs you in the Red Room right away."

The Soldier set his towel on the bed and followed Lukin. When he entered the room, General Karpov was standing there with another girl. This one had red hair and striking green eyes. He looked back and forth between Karpov and the girl.

"We have high expectations for this one," Karpov said motioning to the girl with his hand.

She stared at the Soldier with a determined gaze. She couldn't have been more than a few years younger than he was.

"Who is she?" The Soldier asked without taking his eyes off her.

"This is Natalia Romanova, and she's your new student."

**|| Hey guys! Thanks so much for reading! I just posted chapter one and decided to upload chapter two tonight as well. When I went to go do that I noticed I already have a subscription to my story! Thank you so much XxStephanieDivaxX for the follow! You rock! I'll try to upload this regular****ly to keep you guys interested. Posting at least one chapter every week or two is my goal. If I get too busy with vacation or I'm blocked, I'll be sure to update a current chapter and let you guys know. Thanks so much for reading and don't forget to leave a kind review please! Bye guys!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

_The Red Room_

_August 9th, 7:52am_

Natalia dodged the Soldier's blow with a sharp turn of her head. She swiftly slipped through his legs and hooked her elbow on his ankle, sending him to the ground roughly. She went for his throat with her right arm, attempting to pin him in a head lock, but he was faster. He deflected her arm with his metal one and slid out from under her. He rolled over the top of her and pulled her to the ground with his knee, and, pinning her head with his legs, began to choke struggled underneath him as she watched the ceiling begin to blur. Once she was certain she couldn't get out of the hold, she tapped his knee with two fingers to signal the defeat, and he released her. She rolled up into a sitting position and coughed to catch her breath.

"Better that time," he said as he stood up.

She was about to beam at his compliment when he glared at her.

"But still needs a LOT of work," he said when he noticed General Karpov and Lukin lurking in the corner.

She straightened her shoulders and gave him a brisk nod. She was pretty good at hiding her emotions, but the Soldier could see the disappointment in her eyes.

"Soldier," Aleksander called from the sideline. He beckoned him over with a nod.

"Just sit down and stretch," the Soldier murmured to Natalia as he hopped out of the ring. He glanced back at her as she was stretching her hamstrings and smiled slightly. He swiped his water bottle from the bench on his way over and took a sip of it. "Sir?"

General Karpov crossed his arms and glanced at Natalia. "How's she doing?"

The Soldier swallowed his water and nodded. "She's coming along. She still has quite a bit to learn, but she's trying and she's very determined."

Karpov nodded. "You seem to be a lot gentler on her then you were the last one." His skeptic eyes narrowed at the Soldier.

"She's a good student." The Soldier shrugged. "I don't see why I should be hard on her if she's listening."

Karpov and Lukin exchanged looks. "Well let's hope that's all she is to you," Karpov said with an edgy tone.

"Sir?" The Soldier blinked in confusion. "I'm afraid I don't understand."

"You don't get friends," he said as he watched Natalia stretch her forearm. "We can't have you distracted, and we will happily eliminate any distractions and I don't care how valuable they may be." His eyes flashed back to the Soldier's.

The Soldier stared at him, glanced back at Natalia, then back again. "Understood, sir."

Karpov nodded with satisfaction. "Good. Return to your training."

He dipped his head to both Lukin and Karpov. He set his water bottle back on the bench and slid back into the ring.

Natalia popped back to her feet and smiled at him. "So," she gave him a sly look. "About that compliment."

The Winter Soldier turned and nailed her right in the eye with his left arm. She flew back onto the mat with a THUD and stared at him in shock with a hand over her eye. The Soldier reached down and grabbed her by her shirt and pulled her half way off the ground. "Don't get cocky," he said sharply. "Focus."

She swallowed and nodded, still in shock from the random blow to the face. That was the first time he'd ever hit her, and it was completely out of the blue for her. He dropped her back to the mat and glanced at Karpov who flashed him a satisfied look before exiting the Red Room with Lukin trailing behind him. He turned and looked at Natalia who had stumbled back to her feet. His eyes were cold and robotic, reflecting little emotion. "Now, try again."

**|| Hey all! Thank you so much for the recent follows I got! This story has just started and it's nice to see people interested. I'm sorry about the short chapter! It just kind of wrote and ended itself. I will post the next chapter within a day or two because I already have it written. Thanks for reading and PLEASE PLEASE review! :)**


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

_Sleeping Corridor_

_August 9th, 11:55pm_

Natalia lay in her bed and stared at the ceiling. It was dark in the room, because the lights didn't work at night. She was supposed to he sleeping, but she just couldn't seem to fall asleep. She folded her hands folded over her chest and found herself continually tapping her forefingers together. She couldn't stop thinking about the training session from earlier that morning. Her eye was swollen shut from the blow she had received from the Winter Soldier and she was still trying to wrap her head around on what had happened. She knew that the Soldier was prone to mood swings, but she couldn't help but wonder if General Karpov was somehow responsible for this one. She had been having fun training with the Soldier, and she could tell he was enjoying it too. He had even complimented her. Well, it was the closest thing to a compliment she'd ever received from him anyway. But it wasn't until the conversation with Karpov that the Soldier had suddenly got all tense. She saw his shoulders squared up the second he turned away from him. She'd watched the emotion drain from his face and his eyes went blank. She had mentioned the compliment in an attempt to lighten his mood and bring his mind back to their training. That apparently had been a bad idea.

"What did he say to you, Soldier?" She asked the Soldier as she turned onto her side, perfectly aware that he couldn't hear her. She was more asking herself the question, but she knew it would never be answered. She tucked her hands underneath her pillow and glared at the wall. She liked the Soldier a whole lot better when he wasn't being watched. It seemed that all the times the Soldier was even slightly enjoying himself, it was just him and Natalia. He seemed more genuine. More like a human, rather than just a machine. Which is was Karpov seems to want him to be. Every time he watches the Soldier, he's suddenly expressionless. Natalia couldn't read him at all. And that's what scared her the most. It was almost as if he hardly knew her. Like he didn't care about her. But she knew that wasn't true. When they were alone she could always see it in his eyes. His deep blue eyes that looked like they'd been to hell and back. But yet, he always seemed to find a part of himself to care for her.

She sighed and pulled the blanket up to her chin. She knew she had to sleep, but every time she closed her eyes she kept thinking back to the morning training session. "This is hopeless," she murmured to herself. She was about to pull her pillow over her face when she saw three shadows pass by her door.

Curious, she slipped out of bed and opened her door just wide enough to get her head through. She peeked down the hall and was surprised to see the Soldier being led away by two armed guards. _That's not normal, _she thought. She slid out the door and silently followed them, making sure to keep a large enough distance between them so she could go unnoticed.

They led the Soldier into a long hallway. There were no doors in the hall except for one at the very end. She watched the guards lead the Soldier to the door and, rather roughly, push him in. She followed in after him and shut the door. There was another long corridor in front of her with many doors on both sides. The lights blinded her because they were so bright, but she was too distracted to pay attention to the rest of her surroundings. She watched them lead the Soldier near the end if the corridor and through a door on the left side.

Natalia jogged lightly to the end of the hallway and pressed her ear to the door. She could hear faint voices, but had trouble understanding what they were saying. She glanced down the hallway to make sure no one was coming before eyeing the door handle nervously. She grit her teeth and turned the knob, pushing the door open just wide enough for her to see inside the room.

The Soldier was sitting on a body chair. A computer appeared to be hooked up to the chair and there was a large metal ring over his head that Natalia couldn't identify. He looked nervous as Lukin was standing over him.

"Just tell us what you remember," Lukin ordered as General Karpov paced the room.

The Soldier looked down and Natalia could see the muscles in his jaw tighten. The Soldier glanced up at Lukin and sighed. "Who's Steve Rogers?"

Karpov froze mid step and made brief eye contact with Lukin before continuing.

Lukin watched Karpov pace for a while. His eyebrows furrowed as he chose his words carefully. "I'm afraid I know no one by that name," Lukin said at last. His answer seemed to please Karpov as a small smile crossed his face.

The Soldier's shoulders fell in disappointment. "I didn't think I did either. But the name keeps coming back to me, and no matter what I do, I can't seem to shake this feeling that I SHOULD know him. Every time I close my eyes I hear his name in my head. I can hear his voice too, like he's trying to talk to me." The Soldier glanced up at Lukin again before dropping his gaze back to the floor.

Lukin was looking at Karpov who had stopped pacing to watch the Soldier.

Karpov seemed to be examining the Soldier, for Natalia could see his eyes were scanning him up and down. Finally, and clasped his hands in front of him and said,

"Restrain him."

The Soldier looked up with wild eyes just in time for the armed guards standing in the corners to pin his shoulders back on the chair. Just then, two metal clasps closed around his forearm and his bicep, locking it in place. Another clasp closed around his metal arm right above the elbow and secured it.

"Sir?" Lukin said as he watched the Soldier.

"He's remembering too much." Karpov turned to the man at the computer. "Wipe him."

The Soldier's wide eyes darted back and forth between Karpov and Lukin as he watched a man in a lab coat began typing on the computer. Two other men in lab coats forced the Soldier's mouth open and shoved a towel in it.

Natalia could feel her heartbeat picking up. What were they doing to him? What did he do wrong? He was just doing what they told him to. Who was Steve Rogers? Her legs twitched, itching to go in and help him, but she couldn't tell if it was out of fear or if it was the common sense part of her that held her frozen to her spot.

The large metal ring rotated downward. Two metal plates at each end of the open ring stretched out, and Natalia could see electricity running through the small spikes on the inside of the plates. She watched horrified as the plates close down on both sides of his face, covering one of his eyes.

The Soldier began screaming in pain. The veins on his neck popped out and Natalia had to cover her ears it was so loud. She stumbled backwards in shock. Her heart raced in her chest as she ran back down the hallway, unable to watch. She didn't even remember getting back to her room, but somehow she ended up falling onto her bed, breathing heavily. Sweat ran down her face and she could feel her hands shaking.

What the hell WAS that? Was that some form of brainwash? What were they doing to him? Her head was spinning in every direction and she could feel stomach acid threaten to ride up her throat. She curled up in her blanket and took deep breathes, trying to calm her racing heart. She had never seen anything like that before. She wasn't even sure WHAT she had seen. But she did know one thing; whatever they were doing, they did it because the Soldier knew something he shouldn't have. No, he REMEMBERED something. The whole time Natalia had known him, she always assumed he was here by choice. But she was wrong. What she had just witnessed proved that.

_Well then who is he? _She wondered after she had caught her breath. What was his name? His real name. Why did they drag him here against his will? What made them pick him in the first place? Who was Steve Rogers, and why didn't they want the Soldier knowing who he was?

She stared at the ceiling and listened to the millions of questions that were swimming around in her brain. She growled in frustration when she came to terms with the fact that she knew none of the answers to her questions. But she did know one thing; she was going to find out. She was going to find out just who exactly the Winter Soldier was.

**|| Thanks for being patient with that last chapter! It was super short. I don't usually write super long chapters just to let you guys know, so bear with me here! But thanks for reading and reviewing and please continue to review!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

_The Red Room_

_August 10th, 6:02am_

Natalia walked into the Red Room, fresh towel slung over her shoulder and her water bottle in hand. The Soldier was already in the ring stretching his only normal arm when she walked in. His head snapped up and he stared at her. She stared back. Something about him was different, but she couldn't put her finger on it.

"You're late," he said flatly. His icy blue eyes scanned her, taking in all light but reflecting none.

She was startled by his vacant expression. "Only by two minutes," she said as she glanced back at the clock that hung above the doorway.

He stood up and drew his arm back behind his head and pulled on it with his metal one. "The session begins at 6:00, not 6:02." His eyes stabbed hers. There was something about them. The way he looked at her almost looked like he was meeting her for the first time.

Her eyes turned to slits as she approached the Soldier. She examined his empty face. "What's my name?" She said as she began stretching her arm.

"Natalia," he replied without missing a beat.

"Last name?"

Her questions seemed to irritate him as she could see his shoulders starting to tighten. "Romanova." Again, no hesitation.

"How long have we known each other?" Got him.

The Soldier glared with a mixture of annoyance and confusion. His metal arm reached up and grabbed her by the throat. He thrust her to the ground roughly and straddled her. "No more questions!" He growled.

She nodded quickly and he pulled off her. She sat up, rubbing her throat. He never went straight to anger with her. He would have at least given her a warning. Unless he didn't remember her at all. She was starting to feel something for him, but whether it was friendship, or something more, she had yet to figure out. But his memory loss was making the whole relationship between them just that much harder. Not even as a friendship, but as apprentice and mentor. How was he supposed to keep training her if he kept forgetting her progress?

He stood up and beckoned her with his hand, pulling her to her feet when she took it. "Now, focus. No more conversation. You need to train."

She snapped. "How do you even KNOW what I need to do? You don't even remember me!"

The Soldier lashed out, and grabbed a fistful of her hair and threw her into the metal support beam on the other side of the room.

She lay on the ground, unable to breathe. Her vision was cloudy but she could just make out the blurry shape of the Soldier as he advanced toward her. Her lungs were screaming for air, but no matter how hard she tried she couldn't get a breath. She coughed but she couldn't inhale.

The Soldier picked her off the ground by her throat, cutting off her air flow completely.

Natalia started seeing spots as she tried to pry his arm off, but it was no use. He reached back and jammed his fist into her eye. Her vision flashed white and she could feel the blood flowing to the injure eye.

He reached back and struck again. But this time, he didn't stop, and soon it was one blow after another. He was like a broken record, stuck in one place, but at the same time, never missing the repeating mark.

Just when she thought she was going to black out, a swarm of armed guards came up behind the Soldier and pried him off of her. It took 6 men just to pull him off of her, but took a total of 9 to hold him down. General Karpov rushed into the room and put his gun to the Soldier's forehead and he froze. Lukin rushed to Natalia's side and examined her face.

"She needs a doctor!" He shouted when he saw her skull had cracked right above her eye. Blood ran down her face, making it almost unrecognizable.

Her vision clouded more and started to fade, but she couldn't think of anything. Not a single thing. Not fear. Not confusion. Nothing. Every time she tried to think, a sharp pain lit her brain and fell dark again. She felt herself slipping. Falling into a state that felt like nothing more than a nap for someone who was super tired. Her heart rate slowed and she felt peaceful. She closed her eyes, allowing the darkened to swallow her consciousness.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

_Sleeping Corridor_

_August 10th, 12:41am_

The Soldier lay in his bed staring restlessly at the ceiling. It was dark in the room, but his eyes had adjusted so he could see the faint silhouettes of the different objects around the room. He couldn't stop thinking about the girl he had sent to the hospital today. He knew exactly who she was. But she was right, he didn't remember. He only knew because General Karpov had told him. He didn't even know why he didn't remember her, but the way she looked at him told him that he had known her pretty well. Part of him felt bad for attacking her, but the soldier side of him didn't feel any remorse at all... About anything. It was like he had two personalities that enjoyed wrestling with each other too much for his comfort. One side of him, the human side, still felt different emotions like fear, excitement, amusement, love... But the other part of him, the more dominant side, buried them all so deep that all he ever felt was anger and the determination of getting his assignments done. He tried to fight off that side sometimes, but it was almost like he was arm wrestling with someone three times his size with his normal arm. it just wasn't going to happen.

He sighed and rolled over. The restlessness had taken over completely and he was at the point where he felt like running a marathon.

Unable to push the restlessness aside, he crawled out of bed and stretched his neck. He slipped on his shoes and opened his door just a crack and peeked out. Once he was certain the coast was clear, he slipped out into the corridor and moved silently down the hall. He made his way to the hospital wing located on the other side of the building. If he could just visit the girl, then maybe he would get some sort of spark, just a hint of a memory telling him that he knew her.

He was just about to enter the hospital wing when he saw two armed guards walking down the hallway right toward him. He swore under his breath and ducked into the nearest closet. It was the most cliché hiding spot known to man, but the fact that it was so cliché was the reason it made him invisible. No one ever thinks someone would actually hide there, so no one ever bothers to check.

He waited until he saw their shadows pass over the light shining through the bottom of the door before slipping back into the hallway.

He scanned through the windows of the rooms, making sure to stay out of sight of the doctors inside them, when he stopped dead in his tracks.

Natalia lay in the third room on the right side of the corridor. She was hooked up to all sorts of machines with a bandage around her head and a tube running up her nose and down the back of her throat.

The Soldier scanned the hallways once more before he entered the room. He closed the door quietly behind him and closed the shades on the windows. Walking over to her bed, he was aware of the steady beep of the machine that was monitoring her heartbeat. He couldn't tell if she was unconscious or sleeping, but part of him thought it was the ladder. His eyes held no emotion as he watched her, but just because you couldn't see it, didn't mean he wasn't feeling anything. He was reaching to touch her cheek when the door opened and a doctor entered the room.

His glasses rested on the bridge of his nose and he was looking down at a paper attached to a clipboard. He looked up and jumped when he saw the Soldier and reached for the red emergency panic button on the wall.

The Soldier leaped at the doctor and pinned him to the wall, placing a firm hand over his mouth. He held the doctor there until he stopped squirming and just stared at him with wide eyes.

"Now," the Soldier said, "I'm going to move my hand from your mouth, and when I do, I don't want to hear a sound. Understand?"

The doctor nodded quickly and the Soldier released him.

"How is she?" He asked the doctor and looked at Natalia.

The doctor swallowed and nervously flipped the paper over on his clipboard. "Well, the injury you gave her..." He stopped when he saw the look that Soldier was giving him. "I mean, the injury she has, is going to heal. However, she does have slight hemorrhaging on the right side of her brain. We are doing the best we can, but we will only know her true condition when she wakes up. IF," he corrected himself, "IF she wakes up.

The Soldier hid his concern very well. He stared at Natalia with empty eyes but the aching feeling in his stomach was starting to make him feel queazy. He nodded and looked back to the doctor and his eyes grew cold.

The doctor swallowed. "Is there a problem?"

The Soldier pointed a threatening finger at the his face. "I was never here. You understand?"

The doctor nodded vigorously, only allowing himself to relax when the Soldier left the room.

_XxxxxxxxxxxxxXxxxxxxxxxxxX_

_Wake up!_ Natalia screamed at herself as she lay unconscious. She had no idea where she was, and was having a hard time regaining consciousness. But she had this overwhelming urge to help the Soldier, despite the fact that he was the one who put her like this. Her mind was fully active, but no matter what she did, she couldn't wake up. She had heard the Soldier's voice not ten minutes ago. She couldn't understand what he was saying, but she didn't care. What was he doing there? Coming to check on her? Or coming to finish the job...? She had no clue what he came to do. She only knew that he needed help, whether HE knew it or not. She knew him. The real him. Not this fake thing that Karpov keeps forcing him into. She didn't know for sure what they wanted him for, or what they were going to do with him when they were done. _Wake up! Wake up!_

Natalia screamed at herself over and over. What was his name? The Winter Soldier? No. Who was he? _WAKE UP!_

Natalia woke with a start and started to panic when she couldn't breath. She was choking on something. She clawed up at her throat and found the tube running down that back of her throat and yanked it out, gagging all the way. It came free from her nose and she sat up coughing violently. Four doctors rushed into the room at the sound but she waved them off as she forced back the vomit that threatened to come up. Once she convinced her brain that she wasn't still choking, she took some deep breaths and closed her eyes in attempt to calm her heartbeat. When she finally calmed her body, she took a few deep breaths to try to stop her throbbing head, but it was no use.

Natalia did her best to ignore it as she looked at the doctors that were still staring at her, ready to spring into action should anything go wrong. _Where am I?_ Was the first question that she had intended to ask the doctors as soon as she woke up. But her subconscious took over and she didn't even realize what she had said until after she said it. "Why was the Winter Soldier in my room?"

The doctors exchanged looks of alarm and confusion. "I'm afraid I don't know what you mean," one of them piped up. "We've been closely monitoring you and no one has been in or out of this room without the proper clearance and authorization. The Soldier, has neither."

Natalia blinked at them before nodding. "Y-yes, I'm sorry. I must be confused." She wasn't confused. She may have been unconscious, but she was CERTAIN he had been there. She could still feel the tension in the air that seemed to follow him like a shadow. "Where am I?" She asked even though she already knew where she was. She was a smart girl. It wasn't that hard to figure out. But she needed to change the subject before they spent too much time thinking on the first question. It was obvious he had been there. But apparently, he wasn't suppose to be, and the last thing she needed was for him to get in trouble and lose his memory all over again. She needed him to remember her.

"You're in the hospital wing. The Winter Soldier attacked you." One of the doctors explained. He turned and waved a hand to the other three doctors, signaling he had the situation under control, and they departed silently with heads down.

Natalia squinted, trying to remember when she black out. She remembered irritating him and him attacking her. She remembered being thrown across the room and into the support beam. She even remembered her own head splitting open. After that... It took nine men just to hold down the Soldier. He was strong. Too strong. How did he get like that? Did Karpov do that to him too? What else did he do to him?

Natalia snapped up from her thoughts when the doctor approached her. He held up his hand in defense as he handed her a glass of water.

"Don't think too hard," he said. "You had internal hemorrhaging in your brain and it needs time to heal. You need to rest." He smiled at her and walked toward the door. "You'll be better in no time. Then you can ask the Winter Soldier why he was in here yourself."

She looked at him with surprise but he put his finger to his lips, shut off the lights, and closed the door behind him.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

_The Cafeteria_

_August 17th, 12:45pm_

The Soldier sat alone at a round table in the crowded cafeteria. He had a tray in front of him and was picking at a pile of untouched peas with his fork, staring into nothing. Conversations from the other guards and staff in the crowded room weren't heard by the Soldier. He was in his own world in his own thoughts. Natalia hadn't left the hospital wing since he had put her about a week ago. He hadn't gone back to see her though. Whether it was out of fear or stubbornness, he wasn't sure. He hadn't heard any news on her condition, so he just had to assume she hadn't died. They would've told him if she had. Right?

He clenched his fist and bent his fork with his right hand. He looked up when the cafeteria fell silent and noticed everyone was staring at him. He glanced at the fork and slammed it onto the table. He continued picking at his peas with a spoon and soon the conversations of the people around him continued. Why did they do that? It wasn't like he was going to stab someone with a bent fork.

He scooted his tray across the table, officially deciding he wasn't hungry. He uncapped his water bottle and took a few swallows.

"You gonna eat those?"

The familiar voice made the Soldier half choke on his water and he looked up to see Natalia leaning on the table staring at him. She had stitches above her eye where her skull split, but other than than a split lip, she looked good.

She looked at the pile of peas on his tray and raised her eyebrows.

Amusement flashed quickly through the corner of his eye and waved his hand at the tray. "Go ahead."

She gave him a quirky smile before sitting across from him. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," he said with a hint of confusion.

Natalia picked up the bent fork and swung it back and forth between her fingertips. "Doesn't look like nothing." She took two hands and bent the fork back and began eating a few of the peas.

The Soldier shrugged. "Just a lot on my mind." He shook his head to signify the lack of importance on the matter. "So you're back I see."

She nodded, shoving a full spoonful of peas into her mouth. "God, hospital food sucks." She picked up a turkey leg and took a large bite from it and winked at the Soldier.

He stared at her and a hint of a smile crossed his lips.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" One of the guards passing by with his empty tray had stopped and was staring at the two of them. He had broad shoulders and his nose looked like it had been broken one too many times.

Natalia swallowed and looked up at him. "Care to elaborate?"

The guard looked back and forth between the Soldier and Natalia. "This is the freak who put you in the hospital and now you're deciding to eat lunch with him?"

The Soldier slowly clenched his fist under the table.

Natalia crossed her arms over the table and her gaze was unforgiving. "I'm a big girl. I don't tell who to and who not to trust, so walk away and mind your own business."

"Crazy whore," the guard said as he turned from the table.

The Soldier stood up abruptly and grabbed the guard by the shirt collar, causing him to drop his tray.

"Don't," Natalia said.

The Soldier glanced at her but kept his focus on the guard who was staring at him. He didn't look afraid, but the Soldier could feel him tense.

"He's not worth it."

The Soldier just stared at the guard, but if looks could kill, he'd be dead one thousand times over. He let go of the guard and shoved him, sending him stumbling in the other direction. He sighed and sat back at the table and leaned his head on his fist.

Why the Soldier was feeling protective over his student, he had no idea. He shouldn't be feeling any sort of connection with her at all. It was dangerous. But the Soldier couldn't help but feel there was something between them. For the first time that he could remember, he had someone there for him. He had a strange attachment to her that he couldn't explain. It was almost like they were... Acquaintances? Friends? Just colleagues? He wasn't sure. All he could figure out was that he liked her company, and anyone threatening to take that away from him would pay for it severely.

Natalia set the fork down on the table, knocking the Soldier out of his thoughts. She watched him. Her green eyes trailed up and down his body as she studied him. "What are you thinking?" She asked quietly.

The Soldier shook his head, face still a blank slate. "Nothing," he lied and took another drink of his water.

She opened her mouth to press, but closed it again. It was silent for a while as Natalia finished what was left of the Soldier's lunch and slid the tray back over to him. "What were you doing in my hospital room?"

"Pardon?" The Soldier said, surprised by her question.

"Last week," her intense eyes trained on his, Natalia questioned him, "you came into my room after the attack. Why?"

The Soldier was taken aback. She had been unconscious when he was there. He was positive she was. In fact, she was in a deep coma. How did she possibly know that he was there? Unless the doctor told her. He had threatened that doctor, so he better not have told her.

The Soldier cleared his throat and folded his arms across the table. "How did you know that?"

She hesitated on her answer, unsure of what to say. "I could hear you. I couldn't understand what you were saying, but I recognized your voice," she admitted.

He looked at her. "So the doctor didn't tell you?"

Confusion crossed through her eyes and she blinked at him. "Did you talk to him?"

The Soldier scoffed. "You didn't think I was taking to you, did you?"

"I wasn't sure." She glared at the table, trying to make sense of that night. "So that's how he knew you'd been there."

"Did he tell you I had been there?"

"No, I told you, I could hear you." She rubbed her temples, clearly fighting a headache. "I don't know how I heard you, but I guess that thing they say about being able to hear people while you're unconscious isn't so weird after all."

"I guess not."

"You're going around the question," she said looking at him with a small smile. "Why were you there?"

The Soldier sighed. "I don't know. I just–" he sighed again. "I came to see how you were."

That made Natalia smile. "Aww. You care about me, don't you?" She accused him with a hint of amusement.

"No," he defended, "I needed to check on my student," he said in a matter-of-fact tone. "I needed to see how much training progress you'd lost so I could plan out the next lesson."

"Okay," her voice raised an octave. "Whatever you say."

The Soldier opened his mouth to protest when suddenly the lights went out. The cafeteria fell silent to the point where you could hear a pin drop. A line of red lights lining the perimeter of the room turned on and everyone started moving at once. The amount of people bustling through the cafeteria knocked him off his chair and onto the floor. A few people tripped over him before he pulled himself back to his feet. The Soldier looked back at the table to ask Natalia what was happening, but she was gone, lost in the crowd.

The Soldier made his way through the crowd and grabbed one of the guards' shoulders that had been standing in the doorway. He drew his gun at the contact but the Soldier grabbed the barrel and pointed it downward.

"Relax," The Soldier hissed. "What's happening?"

The guard scanned the cafeteria, gun at the ready. "Intruders, Soldier. Prepare yourself."


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

_The Cafeteria_

_August 17, 1:12pm_

The Soldier scanned the cafeteria, trying to make out the red hair of his apprentice, but the red lights made everyone's hair look red, which made finding Natalia just that much harder. He stayed alert, ready to spring into action at any moment. There were intruders in the building. _What intruders? Is this a drill?_ He wasn't told there would be a drill today. But then again, they hadn't been telling him things as much as they used to. He wasn't sure as to why they suddenly trusted him less, but he'd learned very quickly to stop asking questions. If it wasn't a drill, who were these people? What did they want? He shook his head to clear his mind. He had to stay focused on the task. Find the intruders. Natalia would catch up.

He slipped through an open door and into the kitchen. His eyes scanned the area, but the dim light made it difficult to see much of anything. He could mainly see silhouettes. He surveyed the room and reached for his knife, only to grab the empty pocket in which it was normally fastened to. He swore and grabbed a small sharp object off of the counter. He must have lost his knife when he hit the ground in the lunch room. But any sharp object was as good as any knife to the Solider.

An arm reach around his shoulders and he felt the cold steel of a blade press to his throat. He was about to break his attackers wrist with his metal arm when a familiar voice hissed into his ear.

"Be quiet, it's me." Natalia said and withdrew the knife from his throat.

"What's happening?" He whispered as he turned around.

He still couldn't see much, but he could feel her shrug. "I haven't seen much of anything, the few people I have run into wouldn't talk."

"Where are they now?" He asked.

"Dead."

He nodded.

"Really? A potato peeler?" He could hear the amused mockery in her tone.

He gripped the potato peeler tighter. "What? I lost my knife in the cafeteria." He defended. "Let's just go." He said, slipping out of the kitchen before she could say anything else.

He ran his hand along the wall of the long hallway as he crept through the dark. He gripped the potato peeler tighter in his palm when he heard voices coming from behind one of the closed doors. Natalia tapped lightly on the Soldier's right side to signal that she had heard it too.

He slid down the wall and squatted down low to the ground next to the door so he could hear better and he felt Natalia slide in next to him. Her breath tickled his neck, making the hairs along his spine stand up. Normally this kind of thing would bother the soldier, but her being this close to him was essential in order not to be seen from the window on the door. The red emergency lights in the hallway started to flicker, shorting out from old age, and eventually went out completely, leaving the Soldier and Natalia in total darkness. The voices stopped when the lights went out.

The door opened slowly and the Soldier felt two men pass him.

"What's happening?" He heard one of the men ask in Russian. Russian. So they weren't foreign invaders. Then who were they?

"Probably nothing," the other replied quickly as he cocked his gun.

"Now," Natalia whispered and before the Soldier could stop her, she was on her feet and launched herself at one of the men.

The Soldier swore quietly to himself and flung against the other one, knocking him against the wall. Fighting blindly, the Soldier stabbed at the man with the potato peeler, feeling it pierce somewhere along his arm, and he cried out in pain and swung a blow at the Soldier's head, which, despite his lack of sight, he easily dodged. After a few more pathetic blows to the Soldier's face, he managed to disarm his opponent by fracturing his wrist. The man yelled in pain and drew his arm away from the Soldier, who now had the gun raised at his forehead.

"Nata–"

"Got him," she said, quickly cutting off the obvious question of whether or not she succeeded in her attack.

He nodded and turned his attention back to the man he was facing and spoke in a low threatening voice. "Who are you?"

No answer.

"Let's try this again." He pressed his opponent's gun firmly between the man's eyes and grabbed his throat with his metal arm, slowly cutting off the airflow. "Answer my question or you die." He eased up the pressure on the man's throat, allowing him to speak, but he laughed instead. "What's so funny?" He growled.

"I'd rather die then tell you anything." He said roughly, spitting on the Soldier's cheek.

"Very well then." He closed around the man's throat and the hairs on his arm stood on end as the sound of crushing bone echoed through the hallway. He dropped the body to the floor with a THUD. Smiling at the heap on the ground, he turned to the other man, who Natalia had in a nice chokehold. "Your turn, and this time, I only ask once."

The man instantly began to squeal. "P-please don't kill me! I'm only doing my job I swear!"

"Who hired you?" The Soldier growled again.

The man shook with fear and tried to escape from Natalia's grip, only to gag when her grip did not loosen. She drilled him in the spin with her knee, causing him to yelp.

"Try that again and I'll slit your throat," she said, pressing the knife up to his neck. "Now tell us, and we'll let you go."

The man stopped struggling and his fear suddenly began to fade. "No you won't," he said finally. "You're going to kill me either way, whether I tell you or not."

The Soldier reached forward and snapped his neck, and the man went limp in Natalia's arms.

"What the hell?" She said as she dropped him. "He was gonna talk!"

The Soldier shook his head. "No he wasn't, and he was wasting my time," he said, turning away from her.

"Wait just a minute. How do you know I couldn't–" Natalia reached forward and grabbed the Soldier's shoulder to stop him, but he grabbed her wrist and twisted it back. He pressed his chest into hers and pushed her across the floor and firmly to the wall, pinning her. His grip on her wrist was firm and unforgiving and she could feel a tingling sensation begin to crawl up her arm.

"Stop," he ordered in a harsh whisper. "He had just stated that I would kill him either way, which means there was no reason for him to tell us. I had to kill him or else he was going to warn the others." His tone was fiery but his face held little expression. Despite the fact that one of the hands that was holding her wasn't metal, his grip was like iron, and it wasn't getting any looser. His tone changed, switching from firm, to annoyed and angry. "You NEED to remember who's in charge here. Who's training who? I'm the master. YOU are the apprentice. And I am SICK and tired of you taking charge and doing things your own way. That is not how this works. You advancing on them in the first place was reckless. We should have followed them first."

"Come on. It wasn't that bad. I got them didn't I?" Her tone sounded proud, but at the same time it sounded seductive. She took her index finger of her free hand and dragged it along the waistband of his cargo pants. He grabbed her wrist and twisted it in the other direction, flipping her around so her back was to his chest and he held both arms behind her back, pushing up on her shoulder blades.

"And stop flirting," he hissed in her ear. "No more of that. I am to train you. That's it. Nothing can go on between us. Nothing IS going on between us. You are my apprentice, nothing more. You understand me? I am the one who decides what we do from now on and if you have a problem with it, you can bring it to Karpov." He let go of her arms and stalked down the corridor, not even checking to see if she would follow.

XxxxxxxxxxxxxxXxxxxxxxxxxX

It seemed like forever before Natalia could pull herself from the wall and follow the Soldier. Her wrist was throbbing from his tight grip, but it was his words that hurt her more. Yes, she was beginning to get reckless. She could admit that. But he had always done his best to be kind to her. He was always more than that. She had been under the impression that he had cared for her. More than just an apprentice. She was wrong. He felt nothing. He was just her trainer. And that's all he would ever be. Whatever she felt for him was gone. Swept away under the rug like a pile of dust.

She narrowed her eyes and cleared her thoughts. Now was not the time to think about that. She had to focus on the task at hand. And whatever anger she felt for the Soldier would have to be put aside and tabled for another time. Right now he was the only one who had her back, and it was absolutely vital for her to do the same. Any lack of trust on either end could get one of them killed, if not both.

She caught up to the Soldier and walked with him in silence. They finally got to a section of the building where the lights still worked, and she could see that the Soldier was still tense from the argument. Part of her felt as though she owed him an apology. But the more prideful side of her told her that he owed her one. If there truly was nothing going on between them, then he did one hell of a job leading her on to believe otherwise.

The Soldier stopped abruptly, causing Natalia to run into his back.

"Hey–"

The Soldier quickly put his hand over her mouth and pulled her around the corner. He didn't remove his hand and she could feel his heartbeat racing. His muscles were tense, but his breathing was firm and relaxed. He didn't move as she saw a man pass by without noticing them and continue down corridor. The man disappeared behind a door at the end of the hall, and the Soldier pulled his hand from her mouth.

Natalia pulled away from the Soldier and rubbed her jaw where his hand had been holding it just a little too tight for comfort. "Okay, what should we do then?" She asked grumpily.

"Follow him."

"Should of seen that coming," she said with a roll of her eyes.

The Soldier pushed past her without saying anything, ignoring her complaint.

Natalia followed after the Soldier. They went to the end of the hall and the Soldier stared at the door.

"So?" Natalia raised her eyebrows at him. "Aren't you going to OPEN the door?" She said sarcastically. "We are still following him, right?"

The Soldier studied the door handle. "Yeah, I've just never been through this door before." He looked over at a small sign next to the door labeled "Restricted Access." The building wasn't new enough to have a good locking system on the door, but the sign was obvious enough to keep unwanted parties out. The Soldier grabbed the door handle and turned it slowly, making sure it didn't squeak, and pushed it open.

This area of the building looked completely different than the rest. It looked a lot newer with bright white lights that ran along the ceiling of the corridor.

The corridors were a lot narrower than the other ones, floored with harsh white tile and pale yellow walls. Doors were placed in even intervals throughout, hiding offices, data rooms, labs and more. The man they were tracking was no where to be seen.

Natalia followed the Soldier inside and squinted at the bright lights. "He could be in anyone of these rooms. How are we supposed to find him?" He didn't answer. But instead wandered into one of the rooms on the right side. Annoyed with his lack of communication, she followed him.

XxxxxxxxxxxXxxxxxxxxxxxX

The room was dark until the Soldier found the light switch and switched it into the on position. The lights flashed to life, revealing a small office room. There was a round table in the middle of the room surround by eight chairs. Stacks of papers littered the table, along with a few notebooks and a few pencils. Other than the table and chairs, the only other thing in the room was a large green filing cabinet. The cabinet looked outdated compared to the rest of the room. It was old and dusty. Rust filled the bottom corners and paint was chipped away in spots, revealing an ugly grey color.

"What... Is this place?" Natalia said as she slowly walked over to the filing cabinet.

The Soldier examined the paper stack. "It's a conference room. I'm guessing it's where they decide my missions." He held up one of the papers with a list of names on it, a few of them crossed off. Natalia opened the filing cabinet and began shifting through it as the Soldier sorted through the papers. Some of them were just lists of names, but some of them were newspaper articles from different countries. Some of them announcing different people who had been assassinated, but then others listed people dying in tragic accidents. Car accidents, fires, illnesses and more. While all these deaths would seem random to the average person, they definitely weren't random to the Soldier. He remembered when each and every one of those people had died. He knew where it happened, and exactly how it happened. Why wouldn't he? He was the one who killed them. He was An expert at taking out targets, but he was even better at staging them to look like an accident. Along the side of each article has the word "Soldier" written in red ink. A sort of documentation saying who staged the accident. He opened another folder and began shifting through another stack of similar articles. He narrowed his eyes. They were pretty much the same; all deaths made to look like accidents. All with the same word written along the side of the article. But he didn't remember these incidents. There was one in particular that caught his attention; an orphanage burned to the ground in Saint Petersberg killing 43 children. He stared at the death count again and felt his heart rate pick up. _I would never do_ _that! I may be an assassin, but killing children was never part of the deal! Why don't I remember this? A _gasp from Natalia jerked him from his thoughts_._

"They have my file in here!" She exclaimed as she yanked it from the drawer. The Soldier walked over and looked at all the files over her shoulder. There were names on each file, each alphabetized in order from last name to first. "I think this is a cabinet of every person who has ever worked for HYDRA." She said as she shifted through some more. "Look! There's General Karpov!" She pulled the file free and handed it to the Soldier.

He opened it and looked at the picture of Vasily Karpov. Born October 15th, 1912. He was recruited to HYDRA at the age of 15.

"Oh my god."

The Soldier looked at the file in Natalia's hands. She had it open and was gaping at the papers inside. The tab on the top of it said "The Winter Soldier" and a picture of the Soldier in black and white was on the first page. His hair was short and combed neatly behind a military-style hat and he face was free of facial hair. His eyes were bright and he was wearing an unknown military uniform. The Soldier swiped the file from her and turned and laid it on the table. His fists clenched as he read it, his knuckles turning white.

"James Buchanan Barnes," he read out loud. "born March 10th, 1917 in Brooklyn, New York, USA. Son of George M. Barnes (Deceased) and Winifred C. Barnes (Deceased)."

The rest of the file was pretty much a blur to him. He couldn't seem to get past the first line. He read it over and over again until he could make sense of the information. His name was James Buchanan Barnes, and he was an American.

**/ Hey** **guys! I am so sorry I haven't posted this! I had it written but I didn't have time to upload it because I just started college this week! So yeah, sorry about the delay! Thanks so much for sticking with me and for your support! Please review this chapter and follow, subscribe, whatever! Thanks guys! :) **


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